Only forty percent today you’ll pay,
Just buy it now, yes, right away,
Before another comes later today.
Announcements for the general public!
Spend money here and you will see
How well we use our profit!
There’s nothing else in this sad world
That it could be without our product –
Avoid future regret,
Depression knocks at your doorstep
Should you in freugality forget
The feeling of the friendly grasp
Of our item’s grip within
And now a word from our sponsor:
Is the rooster’s crow too weak,
Are you suffering from the common cold?
Coughing, sneezing, flaky flatulence?
A foreign feeling distracting masculence?
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And again, once more, I decry it’s free!
Just loan us some of your hard-earned money
By entering a few numbers here and there.
Don’t despair! Just wait, you’ll see.
A survey of all our customers shows clearly, and you’ll agree, that their wallets feel no less lightly than before.
Save a tree. Save a whore;
Live the life that you adore –
Ignore the debt, forget the war,
There is no pain to make your ass feel sore –
Just your ears and eyes are bleeding
From incessant glowing, yelling, shocking, blaring, flashing, blinking commercial gore.